Dossier: No Pants Metro Ride 2017

Agents,

Your mission, if you choose to accept it:

WHAT: 9th Annual No Pants Metro Ride
WHEN: Sunday, January 8, 2017 from 1:00pm to 3:30pm
WHERE: LA Metro System
BRING: $7 for a Metro Day Pass on your TAP card ($8 if you need to purchase a TAP card and the Day Pass), pants you can easily remove, something in which to keep them

For the 9th year in a row, GuerilLA will be participating in Improv Everywhere’s international mission, NO PANTS SUBWAY RIDE (it’s their 16th annual edition of this mission) on Sunday, January 8, 2017!

We encourage everyone to travel pantsless throughout the Metro system that day.  If you have participated in this mission in the past, it is quite different, so please read the dossier carefully.

Everyone will rendezvous at Union Station in Downtown Los Angeles for a briefing and to begin execution of this mission.  The station is immediately accessible from the Gold, Purple, and Red Lines.  Travel from the Expo and Blue Lines will require a transfer at 7th St./Metro Center to either a Red or Purple Line train to Union Station.

Starting at 1:00pm, there will be ride captains at two different rendezvous points within Union Station to lead the mission. They are there to meet & brief the agents, to answer any questions, to have everyone de-pantsed before getting on the trains, and to ensure you leaves on schedule.  Please note the required use of TAP cards on all rail lines.  If you already have a TAP card, no problem.  If you don’t, you will have to purchase one along with your fare at the ticket machines.  This will add $1.00 to your fare.  The ride captains will help any inexperienced transit riders.  Learn more about the TAP card here: http://www.metro.net/riding/fares/tap-time.  And if you want even more detailed info, like where to buy the TAP card ahead of time, check out: http://www.taptogo.net.

Agents will be leaving from Union Station in six groups at different times to travel to Downtown Santa Monica.  Your assigned group depends on the first letter of your last name (groups will be A-D, E-H, I-L, M-P, Q-T, U-Z).  Rendezvous with your ride captain on either the north or south patio, the patios are on either side of the Amtrak/Metrolink passenger waiting area (the roped-off seating in the main lobby). null (Full map here: http://www.unionstationla.com/user/themes/unionstation/assets/pdf/Union-Station-Map.pdf)
Each rendezvous time will be twenty-four minutes before each group’s scheduled departure which should be enough time for a quick briefing, to remove and store your pants, to purchase your fare or day pass – if you have not already done so – and to make your way downstairs to the boarding platform.  Each group will travel on the Red Line to 7th St./Metro Center (the third stop) where you will have eight minutes to transfer to the Expo Line to Downtown Santa Monica upstairs.  When exiting the Red Line, the last two sets of stairs/escalators on the west end of the platform will take you upstairs to Platform 2, from which all Expo Line trains depart.  If you walk in the same direction as the Red Line is traveling and ascend the stairs that are in that same direction, you will be on Platform 2.  If you end up on Platform 1, there will be plenty of yellow signs and a large yellow banner attached to a railing near the tracks saying “No boarding on this platform”.  Just follow the signs that direct you to Platform 2.  You must also tap your TAP card at the validator box when transferring between trains (see them in the foreground next to the escalators). null It is very important that you verify you are boarding an Expo Line train bound for Santa Monica because Blue Line trains to Long Beach also depart from Platform 2.  Make sure the signs on the front and side of the train say “Expo Line” and “Santa Monica”.  There will also be announcement before a train for either the Expo or Blue Lines is about to leave, and there are monitors that will show the amount of minutes left before a train is set to leave.  And once inside a train, there is an announcement that will say if it is for the Expo or Blue Line.

Here are the schedules for each group:

-Last name beginning with the letters U-Z

Your ride captain is Agent Zenshinzo.  You will rendezvous with him in the center of the south patio at 1:00pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 1:24pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 1:29pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 1:37pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 2:25pm.

-Last name beginning with the letters Q-T

Your ride captain is Agent Red.  You will rendezvous with her by the fountain on the north patio at 1:12pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 1:36pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 1:41pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 1:49pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 2:37pm.

-Last name beginning with the letters M-P

Your ride captain is Agent Mico.  You will rendezvous with him in the center of the south patio at 1:24pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 1:48pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 1:53pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 2:01pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 2:49pm.

-Last name beginning with the letters I-L

Your ride captain is Agent Honkey.  You will rendezvous with him by the fountain on the north patio at 1:36pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 2:00pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 2:05pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 2:13pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 3:01pm.

-Last name beginning with the letters E-H

Your ride captain is Agent Jefe.  You will rendezvous with him in the center of the south patio at 1:48pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 2:12pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 2:17pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 2:25pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 3:13pm.

-Last name beginning with the letters A-D

Your ride captain is Agent Silky.  You will rendezvous with him by the fountain on the north patio at 2:00pm.  Departure time from Union Station is 2:24pm on the Red Line.  Arrival time at 7th St./Metro Center is 2:29pm.  The Expo Line train for Santa Monica departs from Platform 2 at 2:37pm.  Arrival time at Downtown Santa Monica is 3:25pm.

Upon arrival in Downtown Santa Monica, we will meet in Tongva Park (https://goo.gl/maps/gHYRs6u8HvJ2).  Walk west on Colorado Ave. towards the beach.  At Ocean Ave., turn left.  As you walk south on Ocean, you can’t miss the sign for the park.  Wait at Gathering Hill, which has a tiered amphitheater. null null null We will take a group picture there, and there will be a few brief words from the organizers.  After that, we will have a debriefing and after-party at two locations, Del Frisco’s Grille (on Colorado and Ocean) and Ma’Kai Restaurant and Lounge (on Broadway and Ocean).  Complete debriefing info is here: https://www.facebook.com/events/935108466617598.  At the debriefing, you can meet your fellow GuerilLA agents, discuss this mission, give ideas for future missions, and learn how to get more involved.

Additional instructions:

Please buy TAP card fare ($1.75: one-way, $3.50: round-trip, $7.00: day pass – and add $1.00 to your fare if you have to purchase a TAP card). The citation for evading fare payment is $250.00, an unnecessary and expensive risk. We recommend the day pass, especially if you are an inexperienced Metro rider.

There are no set rules, but we suggest that if anyone asks why we’re not wearing pants, it’s best to give a simple answer such as “I forgot them”. And it is of the utmost importance to act casual, like it’s an ordinary day on the Metro. We should look and act like we do NOT all know each other.

VERY IMPORTANT: this mission obviously means no pants, but YOU MUST WEAR UNDERWEAR!!!

You should be fully clothed except for pants. The type of underwear you want to wear will be left to your discretion, but we just ask you to exercise a little common sense. The amount of skin you want to expose is your choice, but know that any citation for indecent exposure is a risk you take ON YOUR OWN.  Worried about the legality of pantslessness? This post on LAist.com from before the first year’s ride should set your mind at ease:
http://laist.com/2008/12/30/no_pants_subway_ride_coming_to_los.php

If you are an experienced Metro rider, you can choose your own adventure and board at any station along the route to catch the mission in progress. See http://www.metro.net/riding/maps to view the Metro rail maps and timetables.

Additional suggestions:

-Agents should be dispersed fairly evenly on the boarding platform so that they are distributed fairly evenly on each train instead of clumped up in one or two cars.

-Bring some sort of bag in which to carry your pants. It’s always good to have them with you in the unlikely event you have to re-pants.

-In the event that you miss your scheduled rendezvous and/or departure, you can take a Purple Line train six minutes later to 7th St./Metro Center, but you will have to hustle to transfer as you will only have two minutes until your scheduled Expo Line train leaves.  You can also wait until the next group rendezvous time.

-While we would prefer you stay with your letter group, if you are in a group with a bunch of different last names traveling together, by all means keep the group together.

-Please do NOT disturb the civilians. We want to reiterate the importance of acting casual as it is the whole point of the mission. There is no need to draw attention to yourself as your lack of pants is doing that for you. This mission should also be fun for the passengers who are wearing pants, since their most likely reaction to us will be curiosity and amusement. And some of them are just trying to get from one place to another. Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of pantsless fun at the debriefing and after-party.

-If you encounter the news media during the mission, please do not engage them.  Wait until the conclusion of the mission in Santa Monica.

-For those taking photos or videos of the mission, try to be discreet and keep cameras as hidden as possible.

QUESTIONS? COMMENTS?
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Join the Facebook event @ https://www.facebook.com/events/1244028822333348

Join the Facebook for the debriefing/after-party @ https://www.facebook.com/events/935108466617598

Join the Google Group @ http://groups.google.com/group/glaimprov or join our Facebook group @ https://www.facebook.com/groups/241223061044 to receive any last-minute details, this dossier, future dossiers, & announcements

Check out our website @ http://www.gueril-la.com

Follow us @ https://twitter.com/GLAimprov (the tweets on the day of a mission are quite handy)

Talk to me, Agent Silky, @ https://www.facebook.com/leocgonzalez

See https://improveverywhere.com/2016/12/05/save-the-date-no-pants-subway-ride-2017 for more details about the international aspect of the event.

WHAT: 9th Annual No Pants Metro Ride
WHEN: Sunday, January 8, 2017 from 1:00pm to 3:30pm
WHERE: LA Metro System
BRING: $7 for a Metro Day Pass on your TAP card ($8 if you need to purchase a TAP card and the Day Pass), pants you can easily remove, something in which to keep them

Over and Out (This message will self-destruct),

-Agent Silky